"Obsessive Compulsive Grindr Disorder"

"Obsessive Compulsive Grindr Disorder"

It is a beautiful Saturday afternoon, the sun is out and the birds are chirping. Young Brooklynites are occupying brunch tables and pop-up farm stands near by. Gleaming down at the hustle and bustle before me eleven stories high, I’m in my flat grinding away on my couch. I am tentatively grasping my phone's every vibration and *ping* as if this application is solely a part of my mental being and awareness. Incredibly and miraculously my new habitualized way of receiving instant gratification has been admitted so now I can at least start to address ways of reversing this Grindr “curse”.          

“Can you pls block me? I ran out of blocks and think your ugly.. not interested sorry” -Anonymous Grindr user

Now this may seem quite harsh for the average joe but for others this is the way the world of Grindr sometimes looks. Thought you might be getting lucky with this guy? Think again, because his thirst for potential desire is just the beginning. You are just another profile in his way, especially when he realizes “Max Guys Loaded” has appeared once again at the bottom of his screen. I myself  have felt this way from time to time, a harsh cruel cockpit for patient-less, testosterone-filled guys; not to mention that 50% of this gamble merits you a fun trip to the doctor because of the unwanted fluids that often appear – after a night with a stranger –on your once cute Andrew Christians. I ask myself time and time again "what am I getting from this?" The occasional lucky night with your location's hottest chiseled pair of muscles doesn’t seem to be cutting it anymore. After spending well over 200$ on Grindr’s 12-month based membership plans, I’ve probably interacted with with over 3000 guys from all around the world. "Is this bad?" I ask myself. I don't know, but it has honestly been quite the learning experience. I think with Grindr I've become more aware of my sexual interests and desires, even opening my preference to new ethnicities. There is certainly a underground culture beneath the screens of our very own innocent-looking phones.

“hello there, whats up” 
“looking? into? fun vers bttm here”
(4 minutes later)
“are you there dude”
“dude, you suck pce”
“chill man, I was in the bathroom..” 

The patience test, has Grindr limited our capacity for patience? It surely can get quite frustrating, and when impatience kicks in, it's as if our dicks are spinning around like undirected compasses. Lets try and face North… k? 

I am a firm believer that in using the application my patience has been cut short. I've become quick to assume that my potential primate has no interest so therefore I move on to the next best match. This technology-based way of hooking up has in fact limited our mental capacity for patience while at the same time urging us to seek instant gratification. 

"I just wish we could all be civil and at least human. Confront others and politely state you have no interest in friendship or sexual relations." - anonymous Grindr user
"Do you think you, yourself have been effected by this "instant gratification". You see a very attractive guy online that's searching for certain attributes that you encompass, what do you do? Do you ever find yourself reaching out to this person more than once even if they have not answered you? - me
"I feel like I'm more realistic. I am not so much into "instant gratification" as are most on Grindr (even the ones that say this not what they're looking for, but clearly are). You learn in many instances, many guys have maybe even convinced themselves that this is not what they are in search of, but actions speak truth into what they desire."  - anonymous Grindr user

My fellow Grindr guy brings up a valid point, do we in fact find ourselves searching for certain attributes? And when those characteristics don't show up at the ends of our trembling lubed up finger tips, we need our "quick fix" and settle for the nearest convenient romp? Though my Grindr trials have been a test of my mental capacity to tolerate nonsense and immature cat-fishing games, I've soon realized that this has always been a personal test. From the moment I downloaded the app to my first meet and greet in the flesh and to now, it has been a test of of my great desire to be accepted into the vast world of Grindr. It's been a dire cry for acceptance through my fellow gay men (not to mention I've never really had many gay friends) the application has connected me with many great men in my life. At this point in time meeting those great ones is a matter of patience and acceptance. 


Happy Grinding! 


P.S. Nothing on Grindr is private, so be careful how you portray yourself in your next profiled google image search!
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